Post by wildflower on Feb 2, 2016 19:08:43 GMT
First, I'd like to thank everyone who takes the time to read this very long post. I appreciate any kind thoughts!
It might be helpful to read about me in my profile first..so here we go!
I continuously have been having dreams about a specific person, but before I write about the dreams I think it's important to explain the relationship I've had with this person. I met him when I was in 8th grade, I found him extremely attractive and no other person had made me feel so nervous in my whole life. I'm talking sweaty palms can't talk nervous. We dated for like a month, no big deal just an immature middle school relationship. He broke my heart for another girl. We still texted but honestly he wasn't that nice to me for awhile. Always bailed out when we made plans. I don't exactly remember everything, but I do remember thinking he was like my Edward (you know from twilight haha silly, but that was the thing when I was 14, and what I had to compare my feelings to).
I felt as though he probably thought of me as crazy. I deleted his number multiple times through out 4years because he would make me upset and I decided enough was enough or I was seeing someone else. Through these years I moved on, had other relationships. Most of which were meaningful, and loving. But then I would have a very vivid dream of him, that would consume my thoughts for days, and I felt the need to see how he's doing. I was always the one who reached out to him, but each time I learned more about him. He had mostly been open to telling me things he wouldn't normally tell anyone. In fact I think he told me that. He can be very confident and charismatic, but also insecure. The last time I saw him, I was much more who I am today, I knew myself. Yet I got that same nervous feeling. We talked and drove around, before he left he tried to kiss me but I hesitated. I tried to explain that I had just gotten out of a relationship and wasn't ready yet..but he got out of the car before I could. I texted him after but he was mad at me..I think he felt embarrassed, but I honestly don't remember our conversation. we talked another time after that, we had the same ultimate goals and both grew a lot. Unfortunately, I was an a relationship with someone else, and it didn't work out. Just wasn't meant to be I guess. I wouldn't say I love him, and my thoughts of him are random. Usually when I do think about him, I wonder why, because I never had a deep relationship with him. When these dreams happen, I do think how my life would be if I ended up with him. And if I wasn't with my husband, I would reach out to him. The last time I talked to him I told him I'm getting married and he responded "that's cool" and then I decided not to put his number into my new phone.
Okay finally we we are at the dream part! I want to be clear the dreams I have are completely random, I'm not thinking of him what so ever. The only thing consistent in my dreams about him, is that we have a conversation that seems to last about 5 mins, about how I feel a connection between us I can't explain. I never know his response, probably because I actually don't know what he would say. We do other stuff, like go to parties, swimming, or just random actives. We've had sex in my dreams but only a couple times that I can remember. I always feel like he genuinely loves and cares about me in my dreams. My most recent dream was about 4 days ago, at least one dream every night since has had some aspect of him, I'm either talking to him or with him. But that's most likely because I'm obsessing over the meaning of the initial dream.
Which brings me to present day, I'm now married to the most amazing person I've ever meant. I love him with all that I am, because of him, and our awesome team work, all my dreams will come true. Even though finding out the meaning of my dreams and weird connection to this other person won't change how I feel about my husband, I can't move past it until I figure it out. I feel guilty putting this much effort into it, but I think I'll learn more about myself. I can't reach out to him and actually have the conversation I have with him in my dream, I don't want to betray my husband in anyway. I honestly don't know why it's bothering me so much!!i have no idea if he thinks about me. I'm probably just over thinking. Any help is greatly appreciated!
It might be helpful to read about me in my profile first..so here we go!
I continuously have been having dreams about a specific person, but before I write about the dreams I think it's important to explain the relationship I've had with this person. I met him when I was in 8th grade, I found him extremely attractive and no other person had made me feel so nervous in my whole life. I'm talking sweaty palms can't talk nervous. We dated for like a month, no big deal just an immature middle school relationship. He broke my heart for another girl. We still texted but honestly he wasn't that nice to me for awhile. Always bailed out when we made plans. I don't exactly remember everything, but I do remember thinking he was like my Edward (you know from twilight haha silly, but that was the thing when I was 14, and what I had to compare my feelings to).
I felt as though he probably thought of me as crazy. I deleted his number multiple times through out 4years because he would make me upset and I decided enough was enough or I was seeing someone else. Through these years I moved on, had other relationships. Most of which were meaningful, and loving. But then I would have a very vivid dream of him, that would consume my thoughts for days, and I felt the need to see how he's doing. I was always the one who reached out to him, but each time I learned more about him. He had mostly been open to telling me things he wouldn't normally tell anyone. In fact I think he told me that. He can be very confident and charismatic, but also insecure. The last time I saw him, I was much more who I am today, I knew myself. Yet I got that same nervous feeling. We talked and drove around, before he left he tried to kiss me but I hesitated. I tried to explain that I had just gotten out of a relationship and wasn't ready yet..but he got out of the car before I could. I texted him after but he was mad at me..I think he felt embarrassed, but I honestly don't remember our conversation. we talked another time after that, we had the same ultimate goals and both grew a lot. Unfortunately, I was an a relationship with someone else, and it didn't work out. Just wasn't meant to be I guess. I wouldn't say I love him, and my thoughts of him are random. Usually when I do think about him, I wonder why, because I never had a deep relationship with him. When these dreams happen, I do think how my life would be if I ended up with him. And if I wasn't with my husband, I would reach out to him. The last time I talked to him I told him I'm getting married and he responded "that's cool" and then I decided not to put his number into my new phone.
Okay finally we we are at the dream part! I want to be clear the dreams I have are completely random, I'm not thinking of him what so ever. The only thing consistent in my dreams about him, is that we have a conversation that seems to last about 5 mins, about how I feel a connection between us I can't explain. I never know his response, probably because I actually don't know what he would say. We do other stuff, like go to parties, swimming, or just random actives. We've had sex in my dreams but only a couple times that I can remember. I always feel like he genuinely loves and cares about me in my dreams. My most recent dream was about 4 days ago, at least one dream every night since has had some aspect of him, I'm either talking to him or with him. But that's most likely because I'm obsessing over the meaning of the initial dream.
Which brings me to present day, I'm now married to the most amazing person I've ever meant. I love him with all that I am, because of him, and our awesome team work, all my dreams will come true. Even though finding out the meaning of my dreams and weird connection to this other person won't change how I feel about my husband, I can't move past it until I figure it out. I feel guilty putting this much effort into it, but I think I'll learn more about myself. I can't reach out to him and actually have the conversation I have with him in my dream, I don't want to betray my husband in anyway. I honestly don't know why it's bothering me so much!!i have no idea if he thinks about me. I'm probably just over thinking. Any help is greatly appreciated!
