Post by tribunalofmercy on Nov 20, 2014 13:48:16 GMT
November is my hardest month; this month issues in a seasonal affectiveness for me, because cold comes where I am and brings tidings of a long winter; I begin to feel it in October, and depression knocks Loudly at my unseen door.
Before this year I have been a Slave to my feelings, experiencing changes in my Thoughts because there are few “happy” chemicals released in my brain…for me, I feel physical pain more strongly now; see myself differently in the mirror; desire shots of sugar to numb my world and even crave cigarettes again, lol. Among other things. I am inclined to feel more Hopeless, like my entire world has somehow turned against me…and the battle Begins, until spring. Oh, but I have Spiritual Weapons this year
Has my ‘world’ truly turned inside out? Some people experience serious situational changes: loss of job, or spouse/family member, new health issues or similar crises….I have to remind myself that, in my case, Nothing has really Changed. It’s partly my bipolar disorder, but this year I am Awake, and I Recognize the spiritual battle that is taking place beyond my range of physical vision.
Articles plastered all over the internet tell us of the habits of both consistently Happy people and those who are ‘chronically Unhappy’, and they are Helpful to point us in a positive direction; an underlying issue here in the West that is not often addressed, is the ongoing suggestion of Options by those who would have us Remain in states of slavery to our feelings. We are encouraged to follow our hearts, embrace our imperfections, Take a Break because we Deserve it, Do what we Feel, Buy what we want, keep up with the neighbors and stop worrying about the Consequences of being Ourselves - even if that involves a complete denial of control and personal betterment for its Own sake.
I have nothing but admiration for those who do not experience what I call “mood swings” – those who get up every morning with Single purpose, having planned their day and, short of a meteor crash or major traffic jam, will get from Start to Finish each day with satisfaction for a job well done.
What about those who are in the throes of duality? There is no shortage of temptation to Continue the damaging paths we walk every day in the “world”. I learned Just Enough from my father to understand what “not an option” means; for example, I could not run a stop light if you Paid me. Hell will freeze over if I do not make my bed in the mornings, lol. There is no Way I could take advantage of another….this way of thinking serves as a springboard when it comes to making New decisions that I decide are “not an option” any more.
Three years ago I gained new confidence in my ability to walk long distances. Today, no matter How I am feeling, I get up early (make my bed) and go for a long walk; come back and do aerobics, etc – no matter What I feel. It’s very empowering to know I am conquering the idea of Options…like staying in bed and feeling miserable. I am a morning person so it is Easier to get as much done as possible during that time. I make lists and try to follow them as though my very Life depended on it. It’s nice to have breaks and I allow them in my day, but they are only beneficial when I do not allow negative thinking to create Chaos and self-doubt where there was Order and peace.
It’s little things, really, that end up moving mountains; I Know I am speaking to Someone here. Not everyone is a morning person. Not everyone has a work-at-home schedule like I now do. But everyone who recognizes that our way of Thinking can be challenged; that we do not ‘have’ to be slaves to feelings, options, or peer pressure; everyone who knows that out-of-control experience and believes there Must be a better way, can begin to choose just One thing to Intentionally take control of today.
Otherwise those who understand human nature - who Are in control - may Win the Game, and the entire World may fall into the chaos that comes from options, and the subsequent loss of control.
Mary Anne
Before this year I have been a Slave to my feelings, experiencing changes in my Thoughts because there are few “happy” chemicals released in my brain…for me, I feel physical pain more strongly now; see myself differently in the mirror; desire shots of sugar to numb my world and even crave cigarettes again, lol. Among other things. I am inclined to feel more Hopeless, like my entire world has somehow turned against me…and the battle Begins, until spring. Oh, but I have Spiritual Weapons this year
Has my ‘world’ truly turned inside out? Some people experience serious situational changes: loss of job, or spouse/family member, new health issues or similar crises….I have to remind myself that, in my case, Nothing has really Changed. It’s partly my bipolar disorder, but this year I am Awake, and I Recognize the spiritual battle that is taking place beyond my range of physical vision.
Articles plastered all over the internet tell us of the habits of both consistently Happy people and those who are ‘chronically Unhappy’, and they are Helpful to point us in a positive direction; an underlying issue here in the West that is not often addressed, is the ongoing suggestion of Options by those who would have us Remain in states of slavery to our feelings. We are encouraged to follow our hearts, embrace our imperfections, Take a Break because we Deserve it, Do what we Feel, Buy what we want, keep up with the neighbors and stop worrying about the Consequences of being Ourselves - even if that involves a complete denial of control and personal betterment for its Own sake.
I have nothing but admiration for those who do not experience what I call “mood swings” – those who get up every morning with Single purpose, having planned their day and, short of a meteor crash or major traffic jam, will get from Start to Finish each day with satisfaction for a job well done.
What about those who are in the throes of duality? There is no shortage of temptation to Continue the damaging paths we walk every day in the “world”. I learned Just Enough from my father to understand what “not an option” means; for example, I could not run a stop light if you Paid me. Hell will freeze over if I do not make my bed in the mornings, lol. There is no Way I could take advantage of another….this way of thinking serves as a springboard when it comes to making New decisions that I decide are “not an option” any more.
Three years ago I gained new confidence in my ability to walk long distances. Today, no matter How I am feeling, I get up early (make my bed) and go for a long walk; come back and do aerobics, etc – no matter What I feel. It’s very empowering to know I am conquering the idea of Options…like staying in bed and feeling miserable. I am a morning person so it is Easier to get as much done as possible during that time. I make lists and try to follow them as though my very Life depended on it. It’s nice to have breaks and I allow them in my day, but they are only beneficial when I do not allow negative thinking to create Chaos and self-doubt where there was Order and peace.
It’s little things, really, that end up moving mountains; I Know I am speaking to Someone here. Not everyone is a morning person. Not everyone has a work-at-home schedule like I now do. But everyone who recognizes that our way of Thinking can be challenged; that we do not ‘have’ to be slaves to feelings, options, or peer pressure; everyone who knows that out-of-control experience and believes there Must be a better way, can begin to choose just One thing to Intentionally take control of today.
Otherwise those who understand human nature - who Are in control - may Win the Game, and the entire World may fall into the chaos that comes from options, and the subsequent loss of control.
Mary Anne