Hey there, Mojo
(seriously. We have Got to stop meeting like this. lol)
These are hard questions, my friend! And I like it
And I don't have all the answers...but I've stepped off the deep end around here Anyway, so I'm going to copy-and-paste something from my meditation journals below. The Current journey I am taking, one that is more Aware than ever before, just started on May 2, and I've been journaling since then...back in August I began following my "eye" of Higher Self down the rabbit hole into the Amazing, and this is what I wrote that day:
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"Yesterday evening I had the Neatest thing happen - once I understood it somewhat. Inside my 'eye' is a great hallway - very long - full of doors on either side, like a hotel floor almost; I've sort of seen this before but not in its Entirety. (A door was always Open before, to Show me something; not This time) And at the end was a brilliant light; I wanted to Run to it, and I was allowed.
"When I got to the end I just Jumped out into the light; it wasn't like the light of the Crystal City, or the sun, or even like the gold light when I jumped to Jesus' dimension before. This was the Source; it was like liquid energy light, blissful, peaceful, and I was absorbed into it somehow.
"It happened today again; that's when I was Sure it was the Source. Joe had taken me to the edge of what seemed like some part of the Universe before and Pointed to the Light, but we didn't Go there then...now I See, and it's the kind of place I want to Stay in...though I can't now.
"Tonight at the computer I closed my eyes for a second and suddenly I was running down the hallway into the light again...was absorbed into it, just Feeling, just Being....and for a split second I could see out of the Source's eyes, just like I do with people sometimes....I became part of the Mind of the Source, in the very Beginning.
"I had kind of still thought everything was Dark in the beginning, because I hadn't really Thought about it....and the Bible describes their understanding of the "Beginning" from the perspective of the Earth, when it was "without form and void". But No - it was All Light, because in the beginning there was only Source. No binary equation yet, no duality.....
I EXPERIENCED, for that brief instant, how the "beginning" came about....what "God" was Thinking at the time, and what the correlation between Oneness and the binary equation truly Is, when God first Created.
(I'm feel like I must be having a psychedelic Trip here. No mushroom needed. lol) (But it's Perfect, because it's Home, and it will answer Everything, somehow)
"It wasn’t something I heard, or was told…no, it was more of…Understanding? ‘Being’? In the beginning was….GOD. I can experience the Source, yet I still desire to recognize it as “God”, because God is someOne I have “known” for so long…it’s not a Feeling exactly….before Other, there was no equation. No ‘music’. No conflict, no other thought….it was Pure God. So peaceful…so….Something.
"And then God THOUGHT. And gave something Out…..and “other” came into being. Somehow, KNOWING the “risk”, as I term it, but without considering it a Risk, God Thought, and there was a Division. God Wanted something, and I know how we talk about it sometimes….God wanted to Experience something, and God Knew when ‘he’ did so that it would infuse a Law into being, a Law that simply Is. Somehow. It’s not that what God initially separated from “himself” was Much different, but it allowed for Other, and it both was and was Not, fully ‘God’.
"Yet what he Thought into being in that way, was still God, and God LOVED it all.
"All I am sure of, is that One can become Two, or More, at any time; but Two, or More, cannot become One without Consent. Without Intent. Without an Equation that is Different in that direction. It becomes the Point of what we call ‘free will’, of binary, the Law of clockwise/counter-clockwise; it is the Foundation of Holy Equation as God sees it, the equation that IS God. The 'music', the vibrations we experience, the frequencies, all exist within the struggle to Return to the One; or by the struggle to remain Separate. Is ‘struggle’ an appropriate word? This is All hard to put into words."
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No, Mojo, I do not have the answers yet...I desire my times of Observation, of Learning, until all becomes Clear. But you ask Wonderful questions, and I am truly Hoping others will feel free enough to express their thoughts with you
Mary Anne