How to invite a soul to "walk in" to one's body?

[afterglow]

Yeah...

[holistichealer]

I have a couple of responses for you:

1.) If it's meant to be, it will happen. But actual walk- in's are a rarity. So rare, that the chance of it happening with you is not so great. Keep in mind that most instances of walk- in occur where great trauma occurs to the person. And in those cases, the predominant situation seems to be like a form of "Deus ex Machina". or supernatural intervention. In other words, the chance of such occurring as a result of attempted self- harm is virtually non-existent.

In addition, you, like all beings "here", are here to learn certain specific lessons. Deciding to "check out" doesn't complete those lessons- it only delays them- adding them to what you will be working on during your next incarnation. There is no getting around this.

So, you can "put it out to the ethers" that you're open for an exchange. But in the meantime, come up with a "Plan B".


2.) You state that you feel like giving up because you feel like you've made some bad choices, consistently. That's great! It's great because you have an awareness of doing so. And having such awareness is the key to making better choices. Everything about life is geared to us learning from our experiences- both bad and good. And the thing is, that we are all "hard- wired" to remember the "bad experiences" more than the good ones. (It's a survival thing. Burn your hand on the stove and you'll remember that for the rest of your life- and you won't do it again.)

So, you have demonstrated the ability to recognize mistakes. The next thing is to not make the same ones. (We will make others, but that's part of the process. And that's okay, in the grand scheme of things.) Speaking purely from a survival point of view, you are programming yourself to not make the same mistakes every waking (and sleeping) hour. And your recognition of making mistakes as something unpleasant is proof of that.

Sometimes, we need a change of location, in order to start over. So, maybe in your case, rather than changing from the physical, to "something else", you highest good would best be served by leaving everything and everyone behind by simply moving away to a new place to live, starting over with a clean slate and being grateful that you are aware of past mistakes, so that you can make different decisions from that point on.

But do keep this in mind: When you decide that you have learned the lesson in front of you, the Universe will present you with similar circumstances yet again, not so much as a "test", as a way for you to confirm that you really did "get it" and are ready to move on in a good way.

What you see in front of you as an obstacle, is really an opportunity that you only have to make the choice to see.

[holistichealer]

Okay.

So, the question is, "Do you want to try to improve your life?".

You'll need to make a commitment to this course of action.. to do the work necessary for you to dig yourself out of this "funk" you've judged yourself into. If you make that commitment, I'll work with you to do what I can to help. But the work itself- it's your path. Only you can do that part. It may sound ominous, but the great part is, that you will be able to say that you're the one who did the work and reaped the reward of it.



Think about it.

Then let me know your answer.

[holistichealer]

"Willing to be willing to", is a beginning.

[holistichealer]

Okay.

Before we get started: Choose a different name to use. You are not dumb and are not an "animal". Having a name like that does not serve your greater good. Choose a name that's more pleasing to you, register it here, then come back and let me know what it is.

As for "Plan A", you've made it known. Now trust that if it's meant to be, it will happen for you. Trust it, and in the meantime, don't focus on it. It will be a distraction from working out "Plan B".

[holistichealer]

Much better on the name

Now, let's do an exercise to get some perspective on who you are and what got you to where you are. Consider this to be an assignment:

Write a narrative in the form of a fairy tale, describing your earliest memories and leading up to the present. Take as much time as you want, because it's important to be thorough. Doing it as a fairy tale allows you to keep emotional distance from the story, which is a good thing to do at this point.

So, it will start off as "Once upon a time..."

And remember, don't use "I", "me", "mine", etc. You'll be narrating your life in the third person. In other words, you'll speak as if you were simply an observer with all of the facts. And it will be best to write it in a file on your computer first, get it ready, and then post it. That way, you won't lose it. And that way, you can read it and fill in blanks first as you see fit.

No hurry on this.

[holistichealer]

No. The point of the assignment is to allow you to tell your story, while keeping some emotional distance and not getting overwhelmed by what comes up for you. Once you get started on it, it will become surprisingly easy. But make it real. This isn't a fantasy exercise.

[Leon]

Please holistic healer, no links, no attempts to swap emails.. We aim to keep the whole group safe. So please keep all conversation here.

[holistichealer]

Hi, Leon.

I'll keep that in mind regarding links, etc. (I don't remember posting a link to follow in the above...)

The idea with regard to the E-mail is for AfterGlow to be in control of the process. With that in mind, the offer will have to not be rescinded, however, I wouldn't post mine, or AfterGlow's on a public forum.

[holistichealer]

Hi, "A".

Start at the very beginning- first memories. Continue to the present.

Your childhood defines who you at the core are more than any other period of your life. Your perception and attitude of life in the present is based upon who you really are at the core.

Things you think are not relevant, may actually be more so than you expect. What you skip over may be what you don't want to "see". And quite often, those events are important to not miss. So, try not to skip over anything, time- wise.

At the same time, you will naturally go into more detail about some things- so go with that.

You will find this to be cathartic in and of itself.

[gilan69]

I would arguee with this that your childhood dtetermines who you are,on my knowledge only "now"determines who you are,thinikng about childhood core this way puts some boders on your real change,if you want to change your life you have to change childhood core ,you can became whoever you wants in any point of time ,only your own perceptions of yourself .your perceptions of your own identity stops you from change,real change,your identity ,you can change it ,if you answer to similar sytuation same we are calling this character,change answer ,you are really never the same person,every moment in time you are shifting ,you never the same ,its only ilusion that you are the same person ,

[gilan69]

one more thing ,change answers and look at results,but be honest with you,do not expect any results just look what comes out if something what you like continiue ,if not change it,do not live up to someone expectations with your own,just learn to answer the best way you are able to act in any given point,matter is not what is happenning but how you act or answer to it

[sparklekaz]

Hi afterglow,

I've been reading your story and the replies you have had with great interest. I do feel for you, as it is obvious you have been through a lot, and because of your experiences are mentally and physically exhausted.

I am not sure exactly what you feel would be achieved by inviting another soul to inhabit you body. What about you? From what I understand, there is a cord that attaches us to our bodies, which is only severed when we die. So even if for arguments sake your body was inhabited by another soul; You would also still be attached to it. I have this mental image of you watching yourself going about your business with another soul in the driving seat and you following behind. I am sure over time you would feel frustrated by your inability to say and do anything while still connected to the physical world, through this etherial cord.

You are not alone in feeling like this afterglow. This self dislike and guilt for what has gone before. But you know the wonderful thing about life is, that at any given moment, you can change, you can live the life you want. Of course it isn't going to happen overnight. People's attitudes will take time to change. But you, yourself will feel at peace with who you are. No longer doing the things that made you feel so unhappy. We have All made mistakes and done things we bitterly regret. We cannot do anything about the past, but we can do something about the present and the future. Ignore the name calling. That says far more about the people doing it, then it does about you. Whatever you have done or been part of, it has not all been down to you. Other people play their part. But when we are stuck in the pain of guilt, we become self obsessed with how we are feeling and are more then willing to take on all the blame. When in truth it is rarely one person's fault.

For now, please focus on yourself and your needs. Take part in counseling, it will help you work through your feelings, and hopefully you will be given coping mechanisms, tools to deal with how you feel about yourself. To get things into perspective. Nourish yourself properly, with good healthy food. Get lots of rest. Worrying about what was, will change absolutely nothing. Channel that energy into focusing on 'this moment'. Each day is an opportunity to start afresh, anew. I truly believe this. Don't let the past paralyse you, because that is what its doing. You still have a long, happy and productive life ahead of you. Don't waste a minute of it.

Love and light
Kaz

[holistichealer]

May 19, 2013 5:24:48 GMT afterglow said:

Apr 27, 2013 10:51:18 GMT Leon said:

Please holistic healer, no links, no attempts to swap emails.. We aim to keep the whole group safe. So please keep all conversation here.

I'm being harassed online by the man at the middle of this mess, so yes, I will have to ask for your email holistichealer. I can't figure out how to private message you or I'd do that. Want to post your email on here, then I can reply and you can delete the post? Thanks.

Hey.

So, it seems that they have the message system set up here so that we can only send messages to Administrators. I tried to send you my E-mail address and got that "Messages to Admins only" response.

Maybe Kaz or Leon could relay my E-mail address to you. I dunno. There seems to be a bit of concern here due to some unethical actions upon the part of past members.

[holistichealer]

And by the way... for the record, I don't charge for healing work. It's a promise I made to Creator years ago, that as long as I make enough in my "day job", to get bills paid, I won't charge for this kind of work.

I know that many people who do healing feel that an "exchange" of some kind (which is typically preferably money...) should take place between the healee and the person helping with the healing, but I feel that for me, gratitude and good Karma are enough.

This isn't to say that I would reject a small token of appreciation of some kind. But I do NOT solicit payment.

So, once again, here on GLF, I feel the need to make a public statement of intent- brought on mainly as a result of concern by Admin's here who still feel the sting of negative events from past events.

[afterglow]

sparklekaz - thanks for the reply, I will go into detail later with a response
holistichealer - whatever works re: the email address. and thanks for the info

But I am gonna ask that this thread be deleted, and very soon, because like I said the person most of this centers on is harassing me. And I don't really want him seeing this stuff considering he isn't interested in helping. I'll save the replies so far.

[holistichealer]

Hi, "Glow"

Well, it seems that you're not the only one who's dealing with the pain of past relationships. The powers that be here have unfortunately let the sting of being taken advantage of by someone they trusted affect the way that they deal with everyone else. As a result, I can't get my E-mail address to you, due to their stringent rules. And they do make the rules here, since it's their "house".

As a result, the best I can do is give you generic info and suggestions and hope that it does you some good. I'm not going to say, "Get some counseling.", "Cheer up.", etc. IMO, such "advice" is likely a contributing factor to where you are now.

Basically, look at that life story you wrote and determine at which point along the way something shifted for you that affected your self- esteem in a deep and far- reaching way. I have a sense that something significant happened when you were about 7 years old. But whenever it happened is just a way to "zero in" on it. The idea is to reframe it in a way that you look at it differently and get a positive lesson from it.

I suggest that you buy Tad James' info on "Time Line Therapy". There is a set of audio sessions in which he;s doing a seminar about TLT that is very good and should not be too expensive. It's about 8 segments.

I'd post a link for you, but "external links are not allowed" here.

Feel free to ask me anything. And feel free to start up another discussion if you like. I'll be glad to do whatever I can do for you.

[holistichealer]

Found this elsewhere. It may be helpful to you.

The most positive minds are still going to have negative thoughts every now and then.

We are not in complete control of our thoughts, some will pop up from time to time that we don’t invite into our heads. The big difference is how we respond to this negative thinking when it happens.

Here are practical tips to help you let go of negative thinking and not let it turn into a vicious cycle.


Understand that you are not your thoughts

No single thought makes you who you are. Our field of awareness is constantly changing from one thought to the next. Many of those thoughts are just temporary experiences that won’t last forever.

Try to imagine your mind as a sky, and your thoughts as clouds passing by. Just as new clouds are always floating through the sky, different thoughts are always floating through your mind.

And like the clouds, our thoughts are never static. They come into view, they change shape, the leave our view. One thought after the next, one cloud after the next.

When you begin to view your thoughts in this way, you don’t attach to them or overreact. You recognize their impermanence and you are more able to let go of them in the moment.


Ask yourself, “What are my negative thoughts telling me?”

In many ways, our minds have evolved to think so that we can better understand our world and adapt to it.

If a negative thought is continuously playing in your head, it could be your mind trying to tell you something (although not always in the best and most polite way possible).

For example, thinking “I’m an idiot” may be your mind telling you that you need to focus more in class, study more, or try harder. Or thinking “I’m a terrible person” may be your mind telling you that you need to try to be more respectful and kinder toward your family, friends, and coworkers.

In many negative thoughts you can find a pearl of wisdom, but you have to be able to interpret the root of what is causing your negative thinking, and not just take it at face value.

Sometimes our minds are purposely negative as a way to draw our attention to certain things in our lives that we may be ignoring. Like all criticism, whether it comes from yourself or others, don’t take it personally.


Play with the pitch/volume/tone of your inner voice

When a negative thought is repeated enough, it can become a habit that is difficult to snap out of. One way you can effectively reverse this negative thinking is by changing the pitch, volume, or tone of your inner voice.

Often by changing characteristics of our inner voice, we also change our emotional reaction toward what is being expressed.

For example, a voice that is higher in pitch or lower in volume tends to be less authoritative and less influential. So if you take a negative thought and make it lower in volume (as if a mouse was speaking), it doesn’t seem as powerful anymore.

By exaggerating your inner voice, you can even make your negative thinking fun and humorous. It’s hard to take “You’re stupid” seriously when it’s in the voice of Daffy Duck or Mike Tyson.

Try experimenting with different voices when you hear a negative thought pop into your head. Find examples of really silly or submissive voices, and repeat your negative thoughts in those so they have less of an impact on you.


Just sit, observe, and wait

As mentioned before, all of our thoughts eventually subside with time and patience. So if you’ve tried these techniques and they don’t work for you, just hang in there and remember “this too shall pass.”

Try just sitting and becoming an observer of your thoughts – without judging them as “good,” “bad,” “positive,” or “negative.”

Instead, just step back and watch them as if you were watching a movie; because like a movie, your thinking by itself can’t harm you. It’s only how you respond to your thinking that really matters.