God's Reply To My Prayer

[wayne]

I hope you won’t mind me posting so often, it’s only while things are a little quiet will I then pen my words for others to read.

Before I give this post though, I want to share something wonderful with you. I have been thinking a lot over some of the stories I’ve told and have come to the conclusion that I may have given to much away - being far to open in other words.
So with this weight upon me, I came to the decision through prayer to leave it up to God in whether He wants me to continue telling of these experiences.

This morning I was compelled to pick a book up at random, in which I have well over 250 and many not read. I opened the book at page (55) and found the answer to my prayer; this is what it said: (True, it is that the writer may become the laughing stock of non-believers but God encourages writers to pen down their experiences. Building up the self-confidence of writers and narrators, the Lord says that we must not pay heed to adverse opinion of our writings when our conscience is clear.)

The author is Anita Bacha, and the book title is: My Journey With God. I purchased this book in Bangalore India, back in 2010, and yet I have not read it.

Of all the books I could have chosen to pick up, and of all the pages I could have opened it too, it just had to be this book and at this page. "INCREDIBLE " don’t you think. So now that I have permission to continue, I will keep offering my experiences in story form whenever I get that urge to do so.

Now for my short post on God and His Grace…

I have told in earlier posts how I keep notes of my experiences then file them away hoping to leave something behind for when I leave this world one day. It is by no coincidence when suddenly I will get an urge to open a drawer or pull out a forgotten sheet of paper that I had misplaced, only to find something I have documented long ago which will cause some tears to flow because of the memory of it. I would like to tell what I wrote down on this little piece of paper which is dated 23-9-2000, and the time was 10:20pm.

As I sat in meditation this night I cried out in anguish, ( Lord - please help me in my sadhana,(spiritual practices) and also with the agitations of my mind, help me to cleanse the specks of dirt from it. Also Lord, help me to rid the fear from my mind which I have when working in such a terrible place.) Before I could utter another word God's reply came fast and to the point which left me crying in gratitude for the Love of HIM.

What I received was (not) in spoken words as one would expect, but given in a way that my mind was full of an understanding that I knew each and every word that was given. It’s impossible to explain in proper detail. The words below is exactly how I received them;

In time you will know (Me) better, you will see (Me) in ALL. Even if you come face to face with a murderer and he has his gun in your face. You will know that (I) am his gun, his finger, and also the bullet. Never give way to fear, know that I am always with you then there will never be room for fear. A true devotee is one who gets on with his life doing service for others and offering its fruits to God. Sticking to righteousness and surrendering ALL to God without fear of anything. What good is a devotee who says he surrenders but fears.....this devotee has no faith in his God, his guru. Remember when you surrender (I) take over. Your life is precious to (Me).....nothing can harm you when you surrender, believe that, (I) dont lie.

Some might say that I have an incredible imagination, or he has lost the plot - or something even worse. But I tell you this; the majority of the people of the world DO NOT know God or what God is. When and if we are serious in wanting to know Him, God will make His presence known on the level that we are on. In doing this it then encourages us to strive harder.

With God anything can be accomplished if only we put ourselves completely in His care, in His Hands. I believe with all my heart that this message....God's reply, is not only for me, but for ALL.

I will tell of my experience with God next and how He told me that I had certain karma to burn off in this life. He also showed me the employment I had to go into for this cleansing. In this type of employment were many dangerous and drug affected people which caused great concern not only for myself, but for my entire family. The prayer above and the answer I was given was in connection with this employment.

[clara927]

Hello Neon,

If you truly feel that you have been too open, then I guess its good to wait until God moves you to. It's been brought to my attention many times today that Im not very sure of my definiton of God or my definition of Jesus. Sometimes I even wonder if these questions are meant to test how stable I am as a person or how easily I can be swayed, or what little things can deter me. Not once have I believed your stories were from your "imagination", by the way. I'd like you to keep sharing, but you can only do what feels right for you.

Thank you

[wayne]

Thank you Clara ...
One thing we must be wary of (especially in today’s world) is not to be swayed towards anything we may feel uncomfortable with. Though sadly many are very naïve when it comes to this subject, they fall prey to those in believing everything told to them. What we should do is listen to what others have learnt and experienced, then look into these things for ourselves. This way we come to a better understanding of it. But the main thing is – (WE) must put in the effort ourselves by going in search of the truth.


Thanks again Clara

[sparklekaz]

Dear Neon,

If you cannot be open in a spiritual forum, where can you do it!

I believe people erect enough barriers between themselves and other people these days for a variety of reasons. Which I find very sad, but I realise that some conversations are more appropriate in places like this, then in casual conversation in life. Though I have often been surprised by the receptivity of others in the most unlikely places. Being open and true to yourself is a very spiritual quality, that I wish more would emulate.

All you are doing is being a good example to others. If people choose to take what you say the wrong way to me that is their problem not yours. People like the Dalai Lama, Mother Theresa and many, many others have done it and I doubt they worried about what other people thought. They believed themselves to be the pencil in God's hands. For them it was enough to hope that the seeds of love and words of wisdom they threw out into the world would find their way into fertile soil and open minds.

I believe you had your answer if that was what you sought, a sign that you were doing the right thing from the quote you found in Anita Bacha's book. But I never doubted for a minute that it was the right thing to do. Maybe you need to have more belief in yourself.

Love and light
Kaz

[wayne]

Thanks kaz, you put that beautifully and gave me a whole new perspective on it.

Maybe this is a challenge for (me) to overcome; the challenge I have been given in life for my own benefit and at the same time give to others something to think on. And yet now at this moment I feel the cause of my problem is the ego!!!

It’s good to tell of our experiences, as long as it does not puff one up with ego. If that happens then I believe our experiences will come to a halt. And this is what’s causing my problem. Not the puffing up of ego but the opposite. I’ve been constantly trying to see if I am telling too much by being to open, I didn’t want to overstep the mark by sounding egotistic, and this worried me. See how the ego plays at both ends, it causes us so much confusion where it blocks our path. Its only when we fully rely on God by surrendering all to Him that our path is then cleared and confusion is no more. At last I can now see my dilemna.

I will tell things exactly how I see them and not by pretending to be something that I am not. What better way to show what one learns of, even if it’s at ones own expense. The ego, it can be like a double edged sword. I think I mentioned this somewhere before?

Thank you both.

[sparklekaz]

Dear Neon,

I can totally relate to what you have said, with regard to the ego. I think this is a common side affect to be honest, of becoming too analytical in our thinking, because we want to grow so much spiritually and become 'self aware'.

I have read many books that deal with the ego, understanding the self, why we react the way we do and how we interact with others, the dynamics of relationships, that I have literally found myself questioning everything I do and think. Which has been great in a lot of ways, in others it has been self defeating. Because I then began to try to intellectualise everything, especially in regard to the ego. Talk about a catch 22 situation lol

For example, if I felt I was making progress, I would feel pleased with myself.. for about five minutes and then think darn it, there is my ego again, because I was giving myself a mental slap on the shoulder. Finally, after many inner conversations with myself, I came to the final conclusion, that it is all about 'intention'.

If I want to share my experiences with people, or talk about a book that has really made an impression on me or about the things I am passionate about like healing and self growth. It is not about my wanting to 'show off' to others. It is just me wanting to help other people. If just one word or sentence, gives someone else a moment of insight or an Aah Haa moment, then brilliant.

I would say your intentions are of the highest. You share the way you do because its a life long interest of yours and you are passionate about it. You feel deep down that your stories may help someone else who happens to read it. I cannot think of a better reason for doing it Neon. I think the ego likes to keep us worrying and going round in circles second guessing ourselves, because that way it stays in control. When you share the way you do, that's the divine within you. When you second guess yourself its the ego. Always go with the first thought.

Love and light
Kaz

[wayne]

Spot on - and thanks.