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Post by jessiethecorgi on May 14, 2012 0:39:46 GMT
I have most of it figured out. If i have resentments against an enemy I can do the Loving Kindness meditation and super charge my karma:
May they have peace
May they have safety
May they live easily
If i have grief i can follow the bible and praise God for my infirmities.
If i have fear i can beg the Living God for mercy. This also goes for character defect. And then follow up asking Yahweh Rophe (the god that heals me) for healing. finally thanking the God that Sees Me for an enlightening experience.
But if i have jealousy what do i do? I do not have envy. I like being me. Most people with power get short circuited when i try to explain a spiritual concept they need to know. I wouldn't want to be that for anything. but i am very needy and addicted to women because my mother rejected me when i was two. i get jealous.
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sparklekaz
Someone asked me.. What is your religion? I said, "All the paths that lead to the light".
Posts: 3,658
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Post by sparklekaz on May 14, 2012 12:30:53 GMT
Dear Jessie,
Learning what causes jealousy can be a difficult thing, but there is a systematic approach to learning why you feel the way you do. There are many things that cause jealousy and as many people have discovered often when it's too late to fix it, the cure is not going to happen externally. Jealousy has an internal cause.
Jealousy is often triggered by low self esteem or self image. This is because our entire world is filtered through our perception filters, how we view the world and how we believe the world views us. If we have a bad self image, or don't feel highly about ourselves then I believe it is because our filters are distorted. Things we see on the outside are changed and our emotional reactions to it are often extreme because of this poor body image, low self esteem and lack of self love.
Our sense of self worth is formed at a very early age. Early life experiences, like abandonment or rejection can have a profound affect upon us. Especially if it happens at an extremely young age, when our personality, character is forming. Sadly, once this we have this image of ourselves fixed in our minds, it is very difficult to change it. But not impossible, it can be changed, but requires effort on our part.
In love relationships, jealousy always involves the two people involved and a third party. Jealousy occurs when the one that is jealous perceives that third party as being a threat to their relationship. Often the reasons for this can be irrational and due to the low self esteem of the jealous partner, they don't feel they are attractive enough, or worth loving, and so think their partner will find anyone else more attractive and lovable then they are.
Whilst often this is an over reaction, there is no doubt, that there are some situations in which these feelings are justified. So it is a bit simplistic to say it is always the problem of the jealous person. Other people do play there part in this and some can be quite manipulative at exploiting the jealousy and insecurity of their partner, to gain the upper hand or control of the relationship. Which we all know is not healthy, and beggars the question is this the right person to be with.
Some might say jealousy is caused by some deep seeded personality fault or insecurity on the part of the person who's become jealous, but it's not necessarily always the case. Everyone capable of becoming jealous at some point in their love relationship because during our relationships we invest our emotions and become vulnerable and jealousy is an emotion, a real 'feeling' of being vulnerable.
So I would say to you, examine your feelings and ask yourself what it is that you are jealous of. Try writing it down, because the very act of writing makes what you are feeling and thinking real, rather then just floating around in your head. It enables you to put it in its right context rather then allowing it to become blown out of proportion in your mind.
Work on boosting your own self esteem and morale. Again, write down all your strengths and positive qualities. As the Buddha said “You, yourself, as much as anybody else in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.” and I would add to this, you are as worthy as anyone else in the entire world of being loved.
Love and light Kaz |
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Post by jessiethecorgi on May 14, 2012 22:53:54 GMT
Thank you so much for responding. i can always count on good old kaz. i am going to start making gratitude lists about my traits. i will thank God and i have a new aspect of God to praise. i forget the hebrew for this aspect but it is the God who sees me. He makes the agenda for our spirtual growth. he knows everything about us and what we need
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Post by Leon on May 16, 2012 1:12:24 GMT
Jealousy and envy are very similar, envy wants to have what someone else has got and jealousy wants to take it by force, jealousy is the out of control brother of envy. In a sense envy is good for you, if you use it wisely, when you see something that makes you envious, you need to work on yourself to be more able to gain what you want. Accept the thought as a call to action, do not take it as a weakness, but a message telling you to do better.
Now the ugly brother jealousy wants to get angry and take it by force, you must speak the same to him. Listen to his message, but let that horrible feeling go. Then work on bettering yourself, so you get to a position where these two terrible buggers do not control your feelings or thoughts. You must tell yourself, they are messengers and nothing more.
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Post by jesusrose on May 16, 2012 2:10:26 GMT
Great responses Kaz and Leon.
If I may add something here, as I've had a similar question in the past.
For me, once I realised that the universe is one and all is one within it, it is difficult to be jealous or envious. I don't know if either of those have to be focused on because once you start to focus on the oneness of it all, those things seem to matter less.
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Post by jesusrose on May 16, 2012 2:12:06 GMT
Great responses Kaz and Leon.
If I may add something here, as I've had a similar question in the past.
For me, once I realised that the universe is one and all is one within it, it is difficult to be jealous or envious. I don't know if either of those have to be focused on because once you start to focus on the oneness of it all, those things seem to matter less.
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Post by moyra on May 16, 2012 9:42:26 GMT
Hi Jessie! You can also try with hoponopono, saying "Im sorry" "Thank You" "I love You". While being jealous we are sending the Universe a message of lack, so Universe gives back lack, instead we could make deep job in finding things to give thanks for, related with those things that cause jealousy. And so gratitude sends a message of abundance and love out there that can give back the things we think we lack when we are jealous. I hope you deal with your jealousy properly with love. Love.
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