Making Mistakes And Overcoming Adversity

[sparklekaz]

It is said, that our adversities and mistakes are how we grow and mature emotionally and spiritually. That it is only by being challenged, do we learn how to resolve and overcome. Would you agree with this and if so, how have you been changed by what has happened to you, and what have you learned? If you disagree, can you explain why?

[aceofcups]

Hi Kaz

To me it is multifaceted question.. and no one answer fits all situations. I think adversity and challenge can be a way of growth if "awareness" is added to the mix. If one is challenged and doesn't see the insight or awareness of what the world or others are trying to tell us then they can just get more defeated, filled with less self-esteem and depressed. One can spend years, a life or lifetimes in regret and resentments. But it one does learn from it, and overcomes the hazards and pitfalls.. it can be the push one needs to their next fulfillment and wisdom.

I have trouble with the word ONLY in question. Can we not also grow by working in joy, unity (the win-win situation) and love? Life has many periods of ups and downs and both can be great learning lessons... if we have open eyes, ears and hearts to see it that way and learn from experiences.

Peace,
aceofcups

[gruntal]

There seems to be a perpetual argument, at times more like the proverbial tempest in a tea pot, as to rather evolution is the altimate explanation of the Cosmos or rather we have some Devine destiny manipulating us for our betterment. Likewise we in the more developed countries wonder what was lost in the process of struggle and if we are becoming fat and lazy in our old age ( metaphorically ) . I think like most arguments is becomes too dependent on existing pre-defined parameters.

Are we getting different or just healing? Is there new of just a memory of what was? Even more to the point are we evolving or just realizing what we always were? The answer makes a lot of difference since we could adapt to our surroundings and that would suggest nothing more then survival of the fittest. What it does NOT explain is desires and longings and why animals just tend to do or be even in a vacuum.

As an example : I have not have good experiences with the human race and do not ever feel lonely. Except in my dreams. Or more like hauntings. Not surprisingly interactions with animals has gone from indifferent to disasterous to wonderment and occaisonally sublime. I FEEL only by living something I never wanted or expected and never planned for. Next time around I FEEL the pain and discomfort of the others in a way that never occurred to me before. It becomes hard to look back at the things I did or said in the past that caused grief and I did not realise or care at the time what I doing. In that I wish I could forget but the lessons can not be disowned - only denied untill they are ultimately dealt with. It is nothing I could gleam from a book. Sometimes it took the equivalent of shock therapy to get my attention.

Another example : I do not have kids (or hardly any relatives) and wasn't around them very much. I thought I tried very hard to help when I thought it was appropriate. I had some abundance and at times would share. But what I accumulated with some sacrifice was just a throw away to one accustomed to gifts. No amount of advice or scoldings could communicate that to one spoiled rotten.

There is nothing free in the Cosmos. All must be bought and paid for. You will only realise it's true worth by making the payments by yourself. If it isn't worth it you can always quit and do something else. But you can never give up and expect to go on living. The rent will always come due. Living in a mansion with a hundred servants will cost you more then camping out in Park Central. But you might not know the difference unless you tried both. Ouch! What devil invented cold and hunger?

[markings]

Adversity may force us to grow and mature but that is not the whole story. People have an innate urge to know more, be able to do more, be more. It is not as powerful as adversity because adversity is often a serious challenge to our life or life style and therefore must be addressed with urgency.
The inner urge is easily smothered, suppressed. It needs to be nurtured and embraced by the person him/herself and that is the most difficult part, even more difficult than coping with adversity and mistakes. Not to do so is actually the ultimate mistake.