What do you do about feelings of pointlessness?

[clara927]

This started a few weeks ago on and off, but yesterday I felt it more strongly and today I feel overwhelmed with it. I feel like I have no passion or desire for anything. If I were to look at myself from the outside. I look like a lazy, shiftless person with no ambition and I hate it. I'm disgusted by the thought of being someone like that. Mostly because I was never like that inside.

I was always ambitious, even in my depression. Even if I didn't physically do something, I always wanted something, desired something. Now I don't know what I want or if I want anything at all. It feels like living a slow, slow death. People could say, "Go out and enjoy your life", but what does that mean when nothing seems enjoyable? I feel like I eat, wear clothes and fix my hair to remind myself that I'm alive. My parent's have always said that I'm wasting my life, and before I knew that wasn't true.

But now I can't even argue with them like I used to because I feel like I don't know what's the point of anything. I dislike being like this and I feel disappointed with myself. I don't really know what to do because I feel like there's no aim. I wasn't as distraught as I am now yesterday, but I had talked to my sister about feeling aimless and she said that I always wanted to do this one thing all these years, and I very good at it and I had something to offer so why should that change? I didn't say anything to her last night, but to answer it now, I don't know.

A few weeks ago I felt overcome with this feeling of confusion, but more than confusion, it was more like a feeling of blankness. and that empty feeling made me confused. It's not like I didn't want to do work that I always wanted to do anymore, it's not like I picked something else, or desired an alternative. It's that I didn't desire anything at all.

Ok, I've been rambling, but I was trying to get everything out. I want to know has anyone ever dealt with persistent feelings of aimlessness?

[sparklekaz]

Dear Clara,

I think we have ALL had moments like that my friend, so please do not think you are alone in this. I know it can be very disheartening and demoralising when we are looking for work and unsuccessful. It often feels that its a reflection on ourselves but it really isn't. Life can become very monotonous and yes its easy to become depressed. When we feel depressed, its as if the world loses its colour and animation and everything seems grey. After pushing and trying with all our might it is only too easy to feel 'why bother', 'whats the point'.

Having said all of that, there are ways of moving out of this place, this feeling. Firstly, look at your general health. Have you been eating well, by this I mean healthy nutritious food. Snacking and filling up on sugary or junk food, can make us feel very lethargic and tired. Do you go to bed at a reasonable time are you getting enough sleep. All these things can affect us mentally not just physically.

I think what you need is some structure and routine, even if its just getting up at a time that you would if you were working. Make sure you go out and get some fresh air and mix with people. Have a re think about what kind of work you want to do. We all fall into the habit of only applying for positions we have only ever done and stop thinking of other options. So when looking for work, don't just look at the jobs you are qualified for or have had previous experience in, look at everything. If you see something you like or have always wanted to do, apply for it. Often all employers are looking for is a genuinely enthusiastic person with a desire to learn if it requires any kind of training. Someone who is open and likes people and enjoys working as part of a team.

You are just going through a phase Clara and it will pass I promise you. You have so much going for you and so much to offer. You do know what you want and you have it within you to make it happen. Often it is when we come to this point, that we find that impetus within, to make a change that will help us move forward.

Love and light
Kaz

[kristie]

Hi Clara, my name is Kristie and I'm new to this site. It's very strange because this is the very first post I looked at as a member and everything you described is exactly how I have been feeling lately. It was almost as if you pulled the emotions and thoughts I've been having right out of my mind. I can relate big time on feeling like I'm living a pointless life...like I have lost my purpose for why I'm here. I am also very confused and almost feel as if I'm at a crossroads in my life. I think people who are going thru what you and I are currently going thru are brought to sites like this one for a reason. It is to help us get out of our ruts and learn how to love ourselves and truly be happy. And also to talk to other people who are also going thru a similar situation who may be able to give us insight as to what we should do...what our next steps should be. I truly hope you start feeling better soon and that you find your way. I feel that if you don't give up, you will absolutely find it. Best of luck to you.

[Floraloak]

Hi Clara and Kristie (welcome to the site),

I agree with what Kaz has said… paying attention to the foods we eat and making sure we go outside, and put some routine in our day helps greatly. I’d like to add (Kristie touched on this), learning to love ourselves fills that ‘pointless hole’… it’s a hole we all fall into at one point or another in our lives… the hole or void we feel is the lack of ‘love for self’… our egos have beaten us down to the point of giving up… we give in to the ego and become lethargic and depressed, we have no goals in life… what’s the point? … our ego will just tear that goal apart again and again…

The answer is to learn to love you (the self) …. I’ve said it many times… affirmations work… standing in front of a mirror and saying… I love you, [insert your name]… over and over again works… the key however, is to keep at it… like anything in life… you get out of it what you put into it… so if you do it half-heartedly… the result will be halfhearted and will not take… but if you do it from the heart and you do it everyday, make it part of your routine… you will start to feel the difference… you will start to notice these feelings of aimlessness begin to lift… now once you start feeling better… doesn’t mean you should stop… you have to continue to learn about yourself and keep moving forward… it’s like taking antibiotics… you have to finish your prescription even if you feel better… or you’ll get ill again…

Clara, as Kaz said… you are strong and you will push through this… of this I am certain… you just have to grab the broom by the handle and just get on and fly… lol. Beats me why I picked a broom… thought it was better than grabbing a cat by the tail.

God bless,
Silvia

[sparklekaz]

Hi Kristie,

I am so glad you replied to this post, because hopefully it will just add credence to what I said to Clara, about how many feel as she does right now. We have all experienced it from time to time. Often it comes at a time when we are no longer happy with the way we have been living our lives.

Things we once enjoyed no longer give us as much pleasure, and there is a lack of fulfillment where once there was. If it is not connected to a stressful life situation, or ill health, this kind of apathy and depression for some can be the catalyst for great change, in a real and positive way. It gets us out of our rut, and it is the motivation to try something new.

On a spiritual level, it is often referred to as 'the awakening'. Our senses become incredibly heightened, and emotions can run high and never far from the surface. I don't know if you meditate, but if you do, now would be a good time to contemplate how you are feeling and see what comes to the surface. Be aware of what is going on around you, often things start to happen in a almost syncronistic manner. You meet people who are new to you, you get idea's out of the blue, you start to read books that are extremely meaningful. Words seem to jump off the pages at you.

Part of Clara's dissatisfaction with her life at the moment probably come from this same root cause. Though all our situations are different and unique to us. So these words are meant for you too Clara. I believe you both have a purpose in life, and now you are waking up to it. Just go with the flow of life and see where it takes you. Don't feel just because you are feeling like this now, you will always feel like it. I think you are just both being guided in new directions. Life is truly a great adventure and we never know what is around the corner.

PS I just noticed Silv posted the same time as I was writing this. Great advice Silvia as always my friend.

Love and light
Kaz

[clara927]

Hello Kaz, Kristie and Silvia. Thank you for all of your responses. Welcome to the forum Kristie. I hope you enjoy it here.

Kaz, I think scheduling and structure has something to do with it. Although I was a afraid for a bit that this was a permanent change, I think I know deep inside that it's a phase. Logically, I know things go in cycles. It's not like I haven't had any moments of happiness in the last two weeks because I did, but they were few and far between. Kristie, I have been in a rut for a very long time and so maybe these feelings are life's way of getting me to take action. I want to think of it that way. Silvia made a point about affirmations and I have to admit I hadn't done mirror work in a while. Probably because I thought I was "past it" as silly as that sounds. In the past, a lot things I would start, I tended to stop doing even if they worked. I think my mood and my feelings would improve if I kept it up. I just need to continue.

Thank you again

[tinamarie]

Hello Clara, Kaz and Silvia .... and Welcome Kristie to The God Light!

Clara, your post was hauntingly accurate in describing the abyss that seems to suck me in, just when I think I've pulled myself out. Kaz and Silvia's suggestions are right on the money, and like you said in your last post ... "I think my mood and feelings would improve if I kept it up. I just need to continue" ... reminds me of three of my top ten favourite words ... Persistence, Consistence, Resilience.

I would like to point out three thoughts that came to mind when I read yours and Kristie's posts.

- Reaching out for help is not easy ... and by posting in the forum, you and Kristie have taken a very important step in getting better.

- Being open to hearing other people's suggestions is another big step.

- Pressing on even when we just want to pull the covers over our heads in the morning, is a huge sign of inner strength.

Your initial question Clara ... "what do you do about feelings of pointlessness?" ... is very personal, as different things work for different individuals. I have tried many different things, and some work well, some don't work at all, and some only work for a period of time, and I'm back to searching.

What has consistently worked for me is prayer ... and something new that I have been "attempting" for a few months ... affirmations. I say "attempting" because I disliked saying them with a passion ... oy!!! In the last month, I have given up "attempting" and have just done them ... every day ... along with my prayer time. I am seeing progress, although I wish it was happening faster. "I am patient with life" just came to mind when I said that, so I guess the affirmations are taking root.

Thank you for your strength Clara and Kristie ... Peace to everyone

Tina-M.

[Floraloak]

Just adding a quick note about affirmations, etc… it took years to program our minds and those negative conversations we have with ourselves and we’re very good at it now… so to reverse those conversations and make them more positive so that they motivate us instead of beating us down will take some time… there is no quick fix… Tina put it nicely… persistence, consistence, and resilience… and of course the all-important… patience!

I also agree with Tina, in that by simply being willing to share your plight here with us shows your strength and willingness to ask for help. Thank you for sharing part of yourselves with us.

God bless,
Silvia

[Leon]

I am sure all of us have felt at some time it is all pointless, that is what brought us to question life, it is what first brought us to our knees, to say to God, why me, why do I suffer. You must not beat yourself up because you have lost your way, there is no shame in it. Does it mean you have found your way if you become a hairdresser a postman a dentist or a carpenter, or a mother a father.

No it does not, this question is far more important than any job, or any role in society, and for this reason, we must not punish ourselves, yes you want to become something, but you should not hate yourself just because you have not achieved what you think you should of done.

Who is to say that you have not been led down a certain road by God, a road that brings exactly the experiences and lessons that you need to help in the future. A few weeks sat at home pondering your life, is not the end of the world, it can be very beneficial. You may feel you have stagnated, but what if God had something planned for you next week, and to make sure you was in the right place, God made sure you was free for a few weeks or months, free so you could take up the challenge that you really need for your souls progress.

The spirit world does not work to an exact clock like us one earth, a few days a few months, its all the same to them. You should stop counting your achievements on earth by what you do each day. You are being shaped for the experience that you need most, so please stop clock watching, God will give you exactly what you need, it might not be tomorrow, or the day after, but it will not be too far in the distant future. Just trust the things you need will come, and stop fretting away each day in worry.

[jesusrose]

Oh Clara - trust me I've felt like that more times than I'd like to admit. What helps? Making a change (even a small one). It'll shake things up and show the universe that you're looking to take control