Hi :)

[tribunalofmercy]

I think I was Supposed to do this the Normal way (here first, then posts), but I keep forgetting..."say hello First, Mary Anne, THen start talking."  (oops)


Thanks for being here, God Light - I'm awfully Antsy because it's not time to Go anywhere again/yet, but it's Time to be restless!  You know?

I'm 49 years old,  from South Carolina in the USA, and I'm spiritual.  And overly-verbal, and Don't mind being reminded to be quiet

Conservative Christian background; I embrace all faiths; I love All people; it's who I Am.     I am a human empath; also diagnosed with bipolar disorder from childhood.

Spent the entire summer this year being "found" and getting Almost Allllll my life-questions answered; now I have to Truly grow.  I am Arcturian but still struggling to release human nature here; it's Always harder than it looks, lol.


I'm very glad to have found you -


Mary Anne

[donq]

Mary Ann, I would like to hear your opinion about something. I love to watch movie, but not into its stars much. I even had to googling on their names before I could write this post. lol.
As you are a friendly talkati…urh…talker. :-) I would love to hear your (spiritual) opinion about these (some ex) couples: Why did it doesn't work or why worked?
George Clooney and Amal Alamuddin, comparing to
Debbi Moore and Ashton Kutcher and Bruce Willis and Emma Heming?
Also, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes.

P.S> Don’t take it seriously. Reply only if you like to or/and when you have time to.
Thanks in advance.

[tribunalofmercy]

...Who? I had no idea those people were Married...oh wait, is this a Girl thing?? (are we supposed to keep up with famous relationships?)

I have this feeling that so Many people end up in relationships where one is the "dependent" one, and the other is the "dominant" one...even among people who are widely known and have things that Define them in a certain way, like money, friends, fame...a person's basic Personality still asserts itself in a relationship.

Many, many people seem to need Outside help to feel "happy" - another person, children, status, money...those things can Define a person, but they find out it Does Not make them happy. Then what do they do? They go out looking Again. They may think, in their minds, "Gee, it is so Great to be married to this person - he is handsome, and funny, and rich, and we have Nice Things - but I Am Not Happy." ...and why not? Perhaps because they married an Idea, not a Person.

A few people in life seem well-suited to one another in temperament and focus, people who are Secure in themselves and who they are...a even fewer of those end up Together - married to one another - but when they Do marry, we call them a Power Couple.


It still may not be for "love", however; it does not seem to Matter to them so much, for they are Sure of themselves with our without love.


So it goes for Western thinking, lol - I have been married before. More than once. First I married an Idea, then I married to have a father for my son (who is now 25) - neither marriage was based on Love, and our own definition of "love" seems to change as we grow to Understand it.

"God" is the only one who has stayed married to me; "he" and I have been married for 27 years now, but that's Another story


On the light side, I like movies like "50 First Dates", with Adam Sandler. He ended up with the Perfect woman for him haha

[donq]

Ok, ok, a girl thing. Why not? Everyone has both yin and yang in oneself, right?
Ah! That was very decent (and spiritual) answer I ever heard. I mean most people would just say, “Gee! They are just actors who confuse the real world with the ideal world in their movies.”
But I don’t think so. I believe everyone could share the same (life) mistakes so that we can learn from them and go forward. I can say this for sure because I was also one of them who used to do that very mistake twice, too. Hahaha.
Thanks again Mary Anne, for your answer.

P.S. Hmm...maybe I'll try to watch that movie, "50 First Dates", though I kind of like action/sci fy movie. hahaha.

[donq]

Hi Mary Anne,

I watched 50 first dates last night and would like to share my feelings.

The movie reminds me of Memento (2000), starring Guy Pearce and Carrie-Anne Moss.

For our friends here who haven’t watched it, here its summary: The film stars Adam Sandler as a woman-chasing veterinarian and Drew Barrymore as an amnesiac. Henry Roth is a man afraid of commitment up until he meets the beautiful Lucy. They hit it off and Henry think he's finally found the girl of his dreams, until he discovers she has short-term memory loss and forgets him the very next day.

To make to long short, what would you do, if every morning, your spouse could not remember who you are any more?

After watching it, a part of me (worldly) felt sad while another part (spiritual) felt peaceful. Sad because somehow I wanted to see a happy ending. Peaceful because it showed the kind of spiritual/universal love; love without wanting anything in return. It’s a kind of love that a parent have for their children, a saint for a mankind etc.
However, the movie was upset me a bit. Though her father, brother or even her husband love her and are ok with her condition that she could not remember them every next morning, but what about her daughter? How could that little girl deal with this? Her mother forget her every morning? Too sad, right?

Anyway, it’s a good movie. I didn’t expect that it would turn out to be a spiritual (or even (sci fi) movie like this.

[tribunalofmercy]

(I'm going to have to recommend less Emotional movies from now on) I suppose I thought it was sweet - just think, Lucy couldn't Possibly build up much Karma that way! lol But, I hear you. :/


I'm just a child at heart, so perhaps I should suggest one of Those, lol - still spiritual, but the musical - Rigoletto? (a nice, safe, tear-jerker, fictional...sort of)

[donq]

Rigoletto?
Hahaha! you've got me!
First I thought it was really a movie, not an opera.

[tribunalofmercy]

It was made into a children's movie. Very spiritual, very allegorical. That's the one I was thinking of.

[sparklekaz]

Hello Mercy.. we have already spoken in chat and here on the forum, so I felt in a way I'd said my hello's already. What I would like to say is... I am so happy you found us, and that you are a breath of fresh air to the site. I love your style of writing, you type as you think. Which is such a friendly and intimate way of expressing yourself. I feel we are already friends. As I am sure other's do too. I love how with some people there is that immediate feeling of familiarity and comfort as if you have known them for a long time. Old friends, becoming re-acquainted so to speak. I thank God for the internet every day, because of it's ability to bring 'old friends' who live far away, back together. Apologies if I'm being too familiar, but I speak as I find. It's that old karmic, group soul thing again lol.

Love and light
Kaz

[donq]

Dear Karen,

I already said it once (or twice? or thrice? Hmm… ) Anyway, let me say it here again.

This is a sacred forum, a sacred place. I do appreciate years of dedication of everyone who are behind the scene: you, Leon, Ace, to name but a few. You have created a so good forum. Why did I say so? Because I have already tried many (spiritual) forums for a decade and I can say for sure that there was not forum like this one. Though we have different background and believe but that never been our problems. This is the real/genuine spiritual community. Almost an ideal one!
Thanks again, from the bottom of my heart.

[tribunalofmercy]

Kaz,

Thank you again for making me feel welcome here; it is such a nice place to be.  I don't make friends easily because I am, well, Different, but also because I seem to lack the skills to be successful at it!   I make lots of Acquaintances - that's the Easy part, but friendships are Deeper; they take time, and they take Willingness to Understand.    I seem to remember making a statement about not doing anything "hard" - for me - in another thread today, lol.  :/


I really, really wanted to "run away" today because I fear I have run others Off...Joe (my spirit guide) patiently waits til I am Listening to him, instead of "full of my own thoughts", and tries to show me Perspective.   And a different Way.    I am Frightened, truly, of what I may have to Be, in order to "stay" somewhere in this way.  Too many "human" experiences have taught me this fear, and now I see I have Not released this.


I think you have a good group of people here, growing and sharing, and that's what's Important.  I have always moved on, from place to place - it's what "I" do.   I need to be fluid, but perhaps I can Learn a way to come at this Differently.  (I mean, really - where do I have to Go, as long as I am on Earth, that the internet cannot reach to some degree?)    It really is just as much a spiritual thing as anything else...

Your kind words mean a lot, but your Friendship means more, Kaz.


Mary Anne   (a.k.a, "Just Me")

[tribunalofmercy]

...and another thing. Maybe two, because I am Really having a catharsis today (not just here, lol) ....I have been told, all my life that what I think, what I say, what I Believe - is Wrong. That I was a Mistake, but everyone "puts up with me" because, what? - they couldn't give me Back, they figured...

Of course, I live in a "free country", where it's Okay (sort of) to have an Opinion - although everything Else I have learned about myself is that my opinion was Worthless. Years and years of learning to undo....to relearn....


So far I have gotten to know Kaz, and Monty, and Gruntal some since being here....I'm sure I will learn others as I go. And My way of looking at myself, as "lacking" in some ways, or negatively, etc is Not just "mine" - I see it everywhere I go, on the internet sites I am a member of, and in life...


I just want you to know I LIKE you all, because I see what you Are, not what "you" think you are! You're not the only ones I Tell that to, lol. Gruntal, you keep Seeking knowledge, storing up information and building a Big "house", so to speak; if you look closely you will See how it's paying off! All of us are still learning things along the way in this life, and every time we learn something New, we have to adjust our Other information around - but that's Normal (historians and scientists do that all the Time, lol - finding out stuff and saying, Oops, wait, we may have to Change all the books for schools now) - gruntal, you also have Natural technological skills that I Envy, (in a healthy way!) - you may have physical problems and I am Sure they are painful and inconvenient, but I wouldn't want you to think for a Minute that it "defines" you as "sick" - any more than my physical problems "define" me. I have Very, very bad eyesight and get to have Another surgery this coming week, but I am Grateful for the years I have had, "seeing" - it's a beautiful world and should anything happen to make me blind, I have built up Quite a memory base


Monty...I declare, you are someone Intelligent, funny and Deeply spiritual; you also have a beautiful Heart, and if I were a woman (okay, that's a silly statement) I would think you were a Perfect man, you know? You say you are over your past but you Mention it quite a bit...your life has Happened to you, but it does not have to Define you. I hope that makes sense...


Kaz, is it any wonder you are such a good moderator? You have Balance, kindness and words of wisdom for Everyone; it takes a certain kind of person for that, and it's a Good Fit.




Of course I see you. And I Need you.

[donq]

Hi Mary Anne,

I’m going to be very very serious here, ok?
(see? Why are you smiling? lol)

Ahem! Ok, now I will be real serious.

Thanks for your kind words. I think that (as you already knew as you mentioned on your posts) what we need in communication, especially (public) spiritual communication like this is sincerity. Which you and I didn’t find it somewhere else. Let me give you an example, on one spiritual forum, a woman told me she drank human blood! Why did she say so? I really didn’t mind if she really drank it (and felt sorry for her condition) but I had some doubt if she lied to me or playing with me. I used to be a webmaster (moderator) of literary website (for earning my living). I had to deal with so many annoying posters there. They enjoyed their fake (multiple) ) personalities (handles) and behaved as if they owned the world. I was curious they would dare say something like that if they really met the person they were insulting? They only did that because they felt safe, hiding behind their handles.
Oh! I was diverting. What I try to say is I haven’t found something like that here, in this forum. Yes, we have had disagreement in some posts but that never been any problems.
As for you, Mary Anne, you already have been my friend some times ago. I didn’t say this just to please you. It’s just that I know that you know that I know. I mean with someone I have to be very careful to communicate to. Even that, most person always misunderstand me in one way or another (got that a lot in my life and already get used to it now). But I never felt that with you. You remind me of one of my spiritual best friend who lived with me in the forest temple. But I haven’t seen him for more than 20 years now.
And yes, I’m old and have had (painful) experience enough to know that there’s no guarantee in this. As you said, it will take time to know other person, really know. But somehow I do believe that we will become very close friends. Maybe as someone (Karen?) said, “We used to be old friends in the past life”.

[sparklekaz]

Lovely words Monty and Mary Anne, you express my feelings about this group perfectly. I have never found such unconditional acceptance as I have here. Met such beautiful people who speak from the heart with sincerity. It's funny isn't it how we all have a different perception of ourselves then what other's seem to see in us. I agree with you Mary Anne about Monty. A very big hearted, spiritual man who writes with great feeling and warmth. I know you have had deep unhappiness in your personal life Monty. But I do believe one day, you will meet someone who will see your true inner beauty and worth. I do think when we are younger, our choice in mate is based more on a superficial level then a deeper one. It's mother nature at work. As we grow older, we become more discerning and what was once attractive in another is not so, and other less obvious ones become more so. True beauty and kindness comes from within and as we grow spiritually, I think we see that more clearly.

Mary Anne, you are such an extremely intelligent and articulate women. Coupled with great warmth and understanding. I love to read your posts, they are so descriptive and show great understanding, of yourself and other's. I have found that those around us who do not 'get us' or appear not to, and seem to focus on what they percieve as the negative, rather than the positive. Do so, because for some reason we make them feel inadequate in some way. And so to make themselves feel better they like to put put us down. You are a very special person, who feels to me to have a boundless supply of energy. When your mind races ahead at 100 miles an hour, it can be for some intimidating. Your genuine and speak honestly. That too can be too much for some.

I do think our negative experienes, trials that we face, can harden and strengthen our spiritual fibre. It helps us to discover what is important to us, what we will defend to the death as it were. It forces us to look within and leads to a deeper understanding of what makes us tick. And it eventually leads us to the conclusion, that no matter what others say about us. We think we are ok. If they have a problem with the way we are, well then walk on. That is their problem not ours. Care less what people think, and love more, I've found to be the answer. I like you and find you very interesting. Those out there that don't see how special you are and value your friendship are blind. I do.

George, is someone I don't think realizes how special he is. I love seeing the world through his eyes. He writes in such a witty, self depreciating style. When I read what he writes, it really makes me think. Within his posts are many layers of meaning. Analogies and metaphors abound. He makes me laugh, makes me think and sometimes makes me sad.

One thing I've learned is that we are all on a journey of self discovery. We all want the same things. To become aware, to understand and to develop a deeper connection with the divine. I love it that we are all different, but the same. A common bond, a golden thread that runs through us all and binds us together. I feel such a deep affection for you all. It's like those stories you read of people that go on quests, and travel the world. We each have a friend on the journey, who would reach out a hand to help, if we needed it.

Love and light
Kaz