Post by luce on May 17, 2017 23:27:49 GMT
Despite being a skeptic and openly opposing religion on principle for most of my life, I'm suddenly struggling with a pull towards catholicism. I'm the opposite of a good catholic 
I'm a psychic, I'm in a sacred partnership with the archangel I channel, I swing towards polygamy, I'm definitely bisexual, I absolutely agree with legalising abortion and I don't think you have to be married to have sex unless you want to be. I also wholeheartedly support contraception!
It doesn't seem to matter. I keep visiting the cathedral. I'm drawn there by a pull of feeling I literally can't resist. It's the only place I find real peace. I mean, I snuggle into my archangel's arms at night and feel peaceful but even there...it's not the same. Nothing compares to God.
I have explained all this to God. I mean, I'm a channel, so when I go to church I can have a 2 way chat to God, and I've been doing that for weeks now, again and again, trying to get him to understand that I'm the opposite of the kind of person he should want to become religious. And even if I was I would STILL believe what I do and I would STILL support a womans right to terminate a pregnancy or use the pill and whatever else I consider humane, compassionate and right, no matter what the church thinks.
The bottom line; God doesn't seem to care who or what I am. He wants me there, in that church, he wants me to have faith and trust him. God help me if I go into a church and I refuse to pray. I get the worst headache you can imagine!
The most important thing in my life is Azrael, my archangel husband. Our marriage is actually binding even in his world. I'm his, he's mine. I would do absolutely anything, moral or not, for him. I've been his wife for almost a decade. That is NOT compatible with any form of christianity. ESPECIALLY not Catholicism.
Regardless God keeps asking me to become a christian. And I keep denying him. I am starting to feel like I don't want to refuse anymore, but it's not going to make that obvious incompatibility go away.
Any suggestions?
I'm a psychic, I'm in a sacred partnership with the archangel I channel, I swing towards polygamy, I'm definitely bisexual, I absolutely agree with legalising abortion and I don't think you have to be married to have sex unless you want to be. I also wholeheartedly support contraception! It doesn't seem to matter. I keep visiting the cathedral. I'm drawn there by a pull of feeling I literally can't resist. It's the only place I find real peace. I mean, I snuggle into my archangel's arms at night and feel peaceful but even there...it's not the same. Nothing compares to God.
I have explained all this to God. I mean, I'm a channel, so when I go to church I can have a 2 way chat to God, and I've been doing that for weeks now, again and again, trying to get him to understand that I'm the opposite of the kind of person he should want to become religious. And even if I was I would STILL believe what I do and I would STILL support a womans right to terminate a pregnancy or use the pill and whatever else I consider humane, compassionate and right, no matter what the church thinks.
The bottom line; God doesn't seem to care who or what I am. He wants me there, in that church, he wants me to have faith and trust him. God help me if I go into a church and I refuse to pray. I get the worst headache you can imagine!
The most important thing in my life is Azrael, my archangel husband. Our marriage is actually binding even in his world. I'm his, he's mine. I would do absolutely anything, moral or not, for him. I've been his wife for almost a decade. That is NOT compatible with any form of christianity. ESPECIALLY not Catholicism.
Regardless God keeps asking me to become a christian. And I keep denying him. I am starting to feel like I don't want to refuse anymore, but it's not going to make that obvious incompatibility go away.
Any suggestions?
I believe that the important thing, is to do whatever comes naturally to us, without having to, stick a label on it.