Getting Tangled Up

[sparklekaz]

Every day I wear a crystal pendant. Today, I was sorting through my crystal jewellary, trying to decide which pendant to wear. I'd made my choice, but it was hopelessly tangled up with a bracelet. In fact there were two chains knotted together, and for the life of me I could not untangle them. I was not wearing my glasses, which did not help, and so couldn't see properly what I was doing. I started off slowly, but after a minute or two got frustrated and started pulling harder. Which only made them knot together even tighter.

It suddenly came to me that my approach to the problem, was a reflection of how often I deal with things in life. I start off patiently, but then when something doesn't resolve itself quite quickly, I get impatient, and try to force things without thinking things through properly. Making this connection in my mind, I decided to try a little experiment. I took a deep breath and cleared my mind. Focusing completely on the tangle of chains and bracelet in my hands. I decided it did not matter how long it took, I was going to take my time. I could not rely on my vision. Only the feel of the chains with my fingers. They did seem hopelessly tangled around the braclet. Jammed in between the beads.

I felt very gently, exploring the twists and turns. I unwound, this way and that. Taking my time. Feeling what felt right. Stopping when it didn't. Within 5 minutes. I had two straight chains in front of me and my bracelet in once piece beside them. In the past I've been known to break something in my thoughtless tugging and rush to get what I wanted. It seemed to me that this analogy can be seen in my life in many different ways. The lesson I have learned today is one that at my age and my so called 'awareness', is one I should have learned a long time ago, you would think. I have found today, that knowing something on a superficial level, is not the same as truly understanding it and following it through. Today it felt very meaningful. Something that I needed to be reminded of.

Love and light
Kaz

[donq]

Dear Karen,

Your awareness really resonated with the wisdom words written more than 2,500 years ago in I Ching. Here it is (just some part of it):

Hexagram 3: Difficulty at the Beginning
Thus the superior man
Brings order out of confusion.

in the chaos of difficulty at the beginning, order is already implicit. So too the superior man (someone who wants to success in what he/she is doing; both in worldly and/or spiritual way) has to arrange and organize the inchoate profusion of such times of beginning, just as one sorts out silk threads from a knotted tangle and binds them into skeins. In order to find one’s place in the infinity of being, one must be able both to separate and to unite.
Difficulty at the Beginning really connotes a blade of grass pushing against an obstacle as it sprouts out of the earth. Times of growth are beset with difficulties. They resemble a first birth. But these difficulties arise from the very profusion of all that is struggling to attain form . Everything is in motion: therefore if one perseveres there is a prospect of great success, in spite of the existing danger.
If a person encounters a hindrance at the beginning of an enterprise, he must not try to force advance but must pause and take thought. However, nothing should put him off his course; he must persevere and constantly keep the goal in sight.
The difficulties at the beginning are too great for some persons. They get stuck and never find their way out; they fold their hands and give up the struggle. Such resignation is the saddest of all things.

I always wonder about two (or three) ways of learning: my way or high way. Real experience is a must? Do I really have to get hurt by its thorn before I know danger of the rose? Though it’s not hard to imagine that fire is very dangerous and could do us harm, but is that a true knowledge that will always stay with us? On the other hand, it’s useless (or even a suicide) to try every supposed to be dangerous thing before one really knows that it’s so dangerous.

If I want to learn the meaning of a word, say, hurl, the easiest way is to look on my dictionary, and I’ll get this as one of its meanings:
“To throw with great force; fling.”

But if I’m into my literature, I might find it in this paragraph:

I was standing on the edge of the conning-tower, when a heavy palm suddenly struck me between the shoulders and hurled me forward into space. The drop to the triangular deck forward of the conning-tower might easily have broken a leg for me, or I might have slipped off onto the deck and rolled overboard; but fate was upon my side, as I was only slightly bruised.
- The Land that time forgot by Edgar Rice Burroughs

Or there’s another kind of learning, Mnemonics (memory Aids):
hurl (sounds like girl): when your girl (girlfriend) is angry since you didn't gift her pearl necklace , she throws the gift or hurls at you!

Ok, all above are just word learning or learning about its meaning, doesn't it? So, how could I really “learn” and have “direct” experience about “hurling”? I mean, no matter how much I learn/know the meaning of swimming, I still cannot really swim, right?

[sparklekaz]

Dear Monty,

Thank you so much for your lovely reply. The words "just as one sorts out silk threads from a knotted tangle and binds them into skeins. In order to find one’s place in the infinity of being, one must be able both to separate and to unite." really resonated with me and validated the experience. It's strange isn't it, how thoughts of this type can just come out of nowhere. How did my higher self manage to sneak in and make a lesson out of this very domestic task of getting myself ready for the day. lol

I like to think that I live each day being grateful and appreciative. That I try to stay in that state of mindfulness. But it is hard isn't it. When cleaning, doing the washing or wondering what to do later on that day. I am grateful for this insight, because so strong was it's need to impress this message upon my mind, it waded in through all the other mental chit chat that goes on in my head.

I liked the paragraphs you quotes to emphasise and explain the lessons of experience. Though I do think hurling oneself from a building might be an extreme way of 'experiencing'. But I get exactly what you mean by it. I will get on with my day now.. but wonder what else it might bring in terms of self growth. Maybe a pearl or two amongst the washing and the cleaning. I often when faced with a tedious and boring task, tell myself to see it as a practical meditation. To bring all my attention to it, to do it as perfectly as I can. That I am enjoying it, as I go with the fluidity of my action and the mind stilling sensation of doing something that requires no mental imput from me. Sometimes it even works.

Thank you for sharing

Love and light
Kaz

[gruntal]

I remember many many years ago driving a 1959 Ford Fairlane around town; a car my parents bought me for my first car. When it broke down I did not much understand what was "beneath the hood" and did not even know where to start. But I was more then curious. I wanted to know. I just did not know where to start.

Many years later I had accumulated much knowledge on things mechanical but at first glance it was more of a hindrance then a help. So MANY things to consider that it was impossible to know and deal with it all. It was a huge head ache even to try!

Can you imagine servicing an airplane? A battle ship? Impossible!

And yet it does get done. The secret I have learned is to break big things down to smaller increments that are manageble. That probably works on many levels. At any point in time there are only certain things that are important enough to deserve your undivided attention.

That is assuming the task isnt impossible to begin with - not always a valid assumption!

[donq]

Dear Karen,

One year after I was discharged from my hospital I had to go back there to recheck my health (doctor's appointment). All of my doctors were so surprised, almost disbelieved their eyes to see me like that. They asked why I could recover my health that fast, I told them the truth that it was because of a hoe!

Let me tell you a bit details. After I was discharged I had to recuperate at my home for 2-3 months. I still could not walk firmly. My mother (or someone) had to buy or prepare a food for me everyday. I was almost bored to death. Finally I decided to go to live in my forest (temple). I had gone there from time to time before that, but this time I intended to live there as long as I could.

Have to tell you that normally there were only 3-4 monks and a few persons living there except sometimes when there was a pilgrim group came to practice mindfulness there, but just for a while. This was because it was very hard to live there as it was one of the most arid areas in my country. The water was so hard to find. We had to build/buy the huge jars to keep the rainwater to drink all year, until the next rainy season.

All villagers who lived nearby were very poor. The land was so barren land. They could only grow some cassava and sugar cane to make their living. So, all of my pre-school students had nothing to eat for their lunch. From time to time, my friends and I had to go back to the city to ask for (canned) food donation, for our monks and my students. As some of my friends there used to work with NGO, they got an idea. We tried to grow our own vegetable garden. Lucky that there was a small pond (which had water all the year) in the area of our temple but we still had to carry it (yes, only one or two small water buckets at a time ) to water our vegetable plot every morning and evening.

I had been a city man all my life and never hold a hoe before. So that was the very first time. But it was a very amazing tool. I could do so many things with it: to dig, scarify and loosen the soil. First it was very hard for me doing this. But when the time went by I became an expert. Hahaha.

To make to long short, after the arduous work my friends and I, our vegetable garden was grown so well. We even succeeded growing strawberry in one winter (though its fruit was a bit so small lol.) We had enough food to feed monks and my students and sometimes even could give them for free to some villagers who were in need.

What I try to say is I never thought this kind of work that seemed to so so little thing could do such a very good thing like that. It really helped me to recover my health in an unbelievable way: physical, mental and spiritual parts. Not to mention its benefit for so many persons there.

You see, Karen, life works in a miraculous way like that. And it works through a tiny little thing, not a grandiose one. We always get some important things from the little things. To make my point here, let me share you this. You first post reminded me of the words from I Ching. But to reply your post I had to search for it again, to quote it for you in English which I was not sure any more, as I already told you that I never done anything with I Ching for more than 10 years now. However, I tried to search it again. And serendipity ran its course. I mean I also found something I never expected. I found almost all of my short storied I used to write from my old email 10 years ago. I thought I already lost them all as I could not find them for a very long time. But just trying to reply your post made me got them back again! I still don’t know what I’m going to do with them. But there’s a chance that it might become my next book, in my language. This was because of you, Karen. Thanks from my heart.

P.S. Again, I wrote this without stopping. Sorry for any error or confuse words.

[sparklekaz]

Oh Monty, how lovely. I am smiling here. That is indeed serendipity. We are all links in that wonderful chain of life. I am honoured to be part of you finding your short stories again. You must let me have a copy of your new book. Maybe a translation into English would be good. But even having a copy in Thai would be wonderful. :)Yes you are so right. Someone once said, 'the beauty is in the small details'. We are all pearls, strung on the necklace of life. Your English is excellent Monty!

George, I agree with you. Sometimes something can seem overwhelming. So much to think about, to learn and apply properly. I have found when facing a difficult task, I too just take it one step at a time. I know from my own experience and from speaking to others that they are often put off doing something before they have even begun. A couple of small examples. When I first started to learn to 'touch type', I found it really difficult. I watched my teacher demonstrate. Her fingers seemed to fly across the keys, effortlessly. I thought, I will never be able to do that. I have to look all the time at the keys. I get my fingers stuck between them, I hold my hands wrongly, and it hurt. Especially when the teacher would hit our fingers with her ruler, for not holding our hands correctly. ha ha I almost gave up. But I perservered, and gradually made fewer mistakes. Though I was still a slow typer. Years later, I can type as quickly as my teacher could. What I didn't see at the time, was that she too would have started as I did, and only by practice, practice, practice and perseverance did she get better.

I guess we all want things to happen easily and quickly. And if it doesn't happen that way, we believe it is that we are not good enough or will never learn. I cannot drive a car, and have never really been bothered by that. But now that I am older, I can see how useful it would have been to learn. I had a few lessons when I was 18 and was so bad at it, I gave up. I could not imagine myself driving with ease as everyone else seemed to do. I was too nervous, too lacking in co ordination. I see now, I was judging myself and comparing myself to everyone else. And finding myself seriously lacking. So rather then fail, I stopped trying. And I can see now, I let my ego get in the way of acquiring a very important life skill. I wonder how many of us do that in other area's of our lives. Where we opt out, rather than risk diving in and not being good enough.

Love and light
Kaz

[donq]

Hi Karen,

Ok, I’ll send you a copy of my new book with only one condition: if it got published. Hahaha.

Hmm…it seems another serendipity is running its course again? I have hesitated to ask you for a while, but I’ll give it a try here. But in any case, please don’t get me wrong, ok?

My friend, who runs a charity publisher, asked me to translate a book into English. I never done anything like this before, I mean to translate a book from my language into English (I’ve only done the contrary). He doesn’t seem to mind about my English. Besides, it’s a charity book, so, who cares, right? But at least I do as I have been earning my living with this for more than 30 years. The problem is he can only afford to pay a little payment as it’s a strictly charitable book. I don’t mind (and never did) about my payment if it’s a good book. Besides, he’s my friend. Anyway, I need to find someone who can edit my final work in English. Could that be you?
Yes, I’m sure I can send you at least 5 books after it’s launched. Yes, I’m sure your name will appear in that book as my editor. But as for your payment, I’ll try me best to negotiate with my friend. But I’m honestly not sure if he would be ok.
The title of this book is “Dad’s memo to son and daughter.” It’s about a dad teaches his beloved kids about (simple) spirituality and life lesson.
Again, please, please, please, don’t get me wrong (and this was the very reason why I hesitated to ask you before). When it has something to do with money, it’s so easy to be misunderstood. If this was not a charitable book, I might be sure to tell that you would get your full reasonable payment. And even you don’t mind about that, it still might seem like I’m trying to take advantage from my dear friend, you. I don’t feel comfortable about those all. And I might feel relief if you will tell me that you would like to help but you don’t think you can have time to do it.
Anyway, I already asked and hope you don’t misunderstand me.

P.S. I will start translating it next year (around May). I have to finish some books before that first.
P.P.S. I apologize everyone who is reading this in advance. Sorry that I've posted something that is quite a bit personal stuff.

[sparklekaz]

Dear Monty,

I am really sorry for the delay in replying to this message. It has been a very busy couple of days for me. First of all I'd like to say that I think it's wonderful that you are doing this. And I am honoured that you have thought of me, and have asked me to help you with your book. But I have to say I have no experience whatsoever in editing a book. I also have a lot of work of my own to do Monty, so even if I said to you, that I would try and do my best, I know that I would not have the time to devote to such an important task as this, and do it justice. I really do not feel I would be the right person to do it for you. I truly hope you are not offended Monty!

I wish you all the luck in the world with it, I have a very strong and positive feeling about it for you.

Love and light
Kaz

[donq]

Hi Karen,

Sorry for my late reply (had problem with my internet again).

It’s ok, really. It’s a charitable book (which some copies will be giving for free), so a neat language is not a must.

As you are my spiritual friend, so I cannot lie to you that I am not (a little bit) disappointed (I confess this just because we are friend. It will be more easy for me to pretend otherwise). And as I already told you, I’d rather feel relieve if you could not help. I meant it. Let me explain a bit here. At least I will tell myself later that I already tried. So, it's my friend's fault that he could not find an editor for me.

[markings]

Sept 27, 2014 15:03:57 GMT donq said:

One year after I was discharged from my hospital I had to go back there to recheck my health (doctor's appointment). All of my doctors were so surprised, almost disbelieved their eyes to see me like that. They asked why I could recover my health that fast, I told them the truth that it was because of a hoe!

I was very interested until I discovered that you were talking about a gardening tool.

Just joking, I read your whole post.